A Year Ago

Posted on Tuesday 7 October 2008

A year ago…

I danced at the Elbo Room like a crazy girl.

I was with my wonderful friend from D.C., who also acted like a crazy girl.

I had embarked on a Spring Break that would last a full year, although I didn’t know that at the time. I thought I was merely celebrating.

A year ago…

I cried and cried all the time.

I hated my apartment and my landlord.

I despaired that I would never feel at home, anywhere.

A year ago…

I had not kissed another man for more than 25 years.

I had not a clue how to act around a man who told me I was “hot.”

I had no clue.

A year ago…

I fretted and worried and wished I knew all the answers.

I did my best to force the answers.

I did my best.

A year later…

I celebrated with friends I have only met since a year ago.

I was quiet and content to be quiet and content.

I celebrated another birthday and knew a certain peace.

A year later…

I can’t wait to live what happens next.

10 Comments for 'A Year Ago'

  1.  
    Angie
    October 7, 2008 | 10:34 am
     

    What a difference a year makes. I’m genuinely glad to see you in such a good place. I’m sure getting out of the crappy apartment helped, but inner peace just takes time. Here’s to a great year ahead and, oh yeah, happy birthday!

  2.  
    knitgirl
    October 7, 2008 | 10:34 am
     

    I can’t wait, either! So keep writing about your journey. I’m in a similar place right now, for totally different reasons and totally different circumstances. I’m living where I’ve always lived, not dealing with relationship hassles or ex-relationship hassles, but my life is unsettled. I envy you that you’ve found you love the restaurant world. I did pastry for a while, enjoyed it, but wasn’t passionate about it. Decided that to keep doing it, I needed to be passionate about it, so I’ve spent the last decade trying to find my niche. I’ve finally got an idea about something, but not sure how I’m going to finance the education I’ll need to get there. The job that was paying the bills became too unstable, the boss owes me 2 months pay, so now I’m on unemployment trying to get my foot in the door somewhere more related to my plans. The uncertainty is the hardest thing to deal with.

  3.  
    Michelle
    October 7, 2008 | 12:14 pm
     

    Happy Birthday! I have enjoyed reading about your escapades! You inspire me, and have touched my life. Keep writing, I am excited for you…to see “whatever comes next!”

  4.  
    Lorraine
    October 7, 2008 | 12:20 pm
     

    It’s been a year, already? Wow, look how different a year can look. Sending you hugs as always.

  5.  
    October 7, 2008 | 12:34 pm
     

    There is no point in my life where I haven’t been able to say, “if you asked me 3 years ago what my life was likely to be like today, I’d have been so wrong”

  6.  
    scape
    October 7, 2008 | 1:22 pm
     

    It is spring here in Australia and I have been amazed at the glory of the Wattle flowers in full bloom along the creek where I walk my dog, a year ago I didn’t see them at all. A year ago I could only lose myself staring at the creek passing by like the torrent of emotions that blotted out the joys of life. How much more the glory of renewed spring?

  7.  
    October 7, 2008 | 2:01 pm
     

    i love that “who knew?” feeling, sugar! all the best to you! xoxo

  8.  
    MenSuck
    October 7, 2008 | 2:57 pm
     

    Happy Birthday RG!

  9.  
    Mike
    October 8, 2008 | 5:23 pm
     

    RG, cent’ anni! (May you Live to be a Hundred!)

    I thought this quote from Richard Nixon’s last speech he gave before leaving the White House after his resignation, bodes well to your past year pretty well:

    “The greatness comes not when things go always good for you, but the greatness comes when your really tested, when you take some knocks, some disappointments, when sadness comes; because only if you’ve been in the deepest valley, can you ever know how magnificent it is, to be on the highest mountain.”

  10.  
    Julie
    October 9, 2008 | 9:31 am
     

    Just one thought… How wonderful!

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