Tomorrow Will Never Feel As Bad as Today

Posted on Thursday 19 June 2008

Get over it. Get over him. You would have broken it off in a month or so anyway, because you are light years beyond him in intelligence, looks–everything.

You were just married too long. Now, you are acting like a teenager, which is understandable, because you were married for so long. Hey, chalk it up to a learning experience.

He is a jerk. He is the reason I am still single. Oh, I’ve dated “him” before, ha ha.

Seriously, he wasn’t cute enough for you. Yeah, I wondered why you were even seeing him. You could do so much better.

Oh come on, don’t blame yourself for being stupid. He took advantage of your vulnerability. He knew exactly what he was doing with a girl who trusted him. Next time, you be the player. Play him!

I’m sorry, but it was all about the booty. Don’t pretend you didn’t know that. The best thing you can do is walk into his bar with another boy, a really hot boy.

I didn’t go out with him, and I could have. Guess why.

I happen to know he’s already seen and is now done with someone else. Yes, really.

Get over it.

Get over him.

So many helpful opinions from those who think they know. Too bad hearing each well-intentioned thought is one more unintended knife shoved ever so slowly into my stomach.

I have a saying that I have often used to calm myself when the pain from illness or grief is quite deep: Tomorrow will never feel as bad as it does today, because today is as bad as it gets.

Today was remarkably horrible. Today, the pain was unexpectedly acute. Today, the hurt I thought was mostly done came out of nowhere, in full force.

So I say it one more time: Tomorrow will never feel as bad as today. And I add this: Because the healing is happening, even if it is imperceptible today.

Today is over. Today is done. The pain will ease.

I know this. I just hate today. Give me that, and then say nothing to make me feel brighter or better or wiser. Please, just don’t say one more thing about how it’s all going to be okay.

Because I just hate today. Give me that.

19 Comments for 'Tomorrow Will Never Feel As Bad as Today'

  1.  
    June 19, 2008 | 1:44 am
     

    Everyone wants to try and make you feel better, huh? Okay, I’ll leave you with a few words from an old friend of mine.

    They invented loneliness to ease the pain of being alone. They invented sorrow to light the hollowed-out path of rotten love and terrible fortune. Good ideas gone astray. Big plans fallen to pieces. Finding yourself at the center of a tattered landscape, holding the crumpled brochure that filled your eyes with possibility and then sent you packing with bad directions. Transmitting distress signals to broken receivers. Resolving yourself to holiday dinners on a wobbly end stool before the wiped-down counter of a 24-hour diner. -manniac

  2.  
    scape
    June 19, 2008 | 1:50 am
     

    the steps we sit on radiate the heat of the day
    the insects chatter and buzz
    cool soothing wine
    the silence….. and a sigh
    ….nothing between us

  3.  
    June 19, 2008 | 7:14 am
     

    ((Hugs))

  4.  
    Joe
    June 19, 2008 | 8:43 am
     

    People have a hard time understanding that sometimes their friend just wants someone to listen, not offer any advice or condolences, just listen…

    We’re listening.

  5.  
    Kris
    June 19, 2008 | 9:13 am
     

    I’m sorry, RG.

  6.  
    Mike
    June 19, 2008 | 9:30 am
     

    RG, always remember, “This too shall pass.” Another great post. As Joe said in his comments, were listening.

  7.  
    MenSuck
    June 19, 2008 | 10:28 am
     

    Awww, I’m sorry RG…. You are right. It does get better though. We’ve all been there too so we understand. Just keep looking towards the tomorrows and the “todays” won’t seem quite as bad.

  8.  
    Jennifer
    June 19, 2008 | 11:00 am
     

    You’ve got to give yourself those bad days. Shoving it all down just means it pops back up later. So do what you need to do and don’t let anyone else tell you how to feel or when to feel it.

    Then give that sweet little pup of yours a big hug and kiss.

  9.  
    Julie
    June 19, 2008 | 11:14 am
     

    Joe’s pretty smart. We are listening. I wish there was something I could do besides send you a hug via the ethernet.

  10.  
    Valerie
    June 19, 2008 | 11:23 am
     

    Hugs and love to you…..

    I love your posts, whatever you want to write about!

  11.  
    k
    June 19, 2008 | 11:53 am
     

    this is why we blog – to say things on our minds and in our hearts, venting, and keep it coming. After a 2 year relationship with someone I truly cared about, we broke up and my aunt said to me: I didn’t think it would work out, you’ll find better – a WEEK after we broke up. I didn’t want to hear it. All I wanted was someone to not talk about it, to divert my attention, to listen, but not to tell me what to do, or I’d be better off. No one wants to hear that, really.
    Enjoy life 🙂

  12.  
    Shirley
    June 19, 2008 | 11:58 am
     

    I’m just a tad confused by the you were married too long comment. Did you get a divorce? For some reason, I thought you were still married, although obviously living away from your husband.

  13.  
    maureen
    June 19, 2008 | 3:58 pm
     

    Tomorrow Will Never Feel As Bad as Today , I’m going to put that away in my arsonal of dealing & pull it out when I need it . Thank You ! I’m so sorry your feeling bad . You deseve better

  14.  
    June 19, 2008 | 4:34 pm
     

    How about distractions? It’s warm and sunny and our pool temp is up to 93 and I will be floating around at sunset watching the bats come out and the birds go to sleep. But right now I’m sitting in the basement room my employer calls my office, listening to the air handler blow cools stuff down here, watching the clock and reading about you.

  15.  
    ML
    June 19, 2008 | 6:17 pm
     

    Hi RG — Oh man have I been there, too. Best of luck, the knife does indeed suck.

  16.  
    Echo
    June 19, 2008 | 8:02 pm
     

    “Don’t walk in front of me, I may not follow.
    Don’t walk behind me, I may not lead.
    Just walk beside me, and be my friend.” — camus

    Across the internet, walking beside you, listening to your thoughts. Sending hugs and healing thoughts your way.

  17.  
    June 20, 2008 | 2:37 pm
     

    It’s tomorrow now, and I hope it doesn’t feel as bad as yesterday.

  18.  
    Jessi
    June 20, 2008 | 11:59 pm
     

    I have to say that I just finished reading every one of your posts and can’t wait for the next one! I feel like I can almost relate to your starting over, and it feels good to know that someone else is just as lost and confused as I am. I’m not going to offer you advice, because I know it won’t help; it will just make you want to scream. I know.

    Anyway, please keep writing, because now I’m addicted to your story!

  19.  
    June 21, 2008 | 12:20 pm
     

    Yeah, sometimes it’s ok to say that it’s not ok. Or, in my case, to just not say anything at all. Just keep at it. It always passes. Always.

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