Comments on: It’s All About Sex

By: Lex

Lex — Mon, 14 Apr 2008 00:39:55 +0000

I am so frustrated with the dating scene. I guess I owe part of it to the fact that I can’t decide what I want. I only wanted great sex for a really long time. Now, I think I want more…but not so much more as a total commitment or anything. See? I haven’t a clue.

Should I sit back and wait for someone to come along and knock my socks off and be all I’ve ever hoped for wrapped up in one person? Or do I love the one I love, flaws and all and wait for him to decide he wants something more?

By: jali

jali — Fri, 11 Apr 2008 18:40:29 +0000

The ones that usually claim such busy sex lives can probably tell you every character on every tv show. Jes’ saying.

I’m in love with my right hand again. Sigh.

By: k

Fri, 11 Apr 2008 16:40:44 +0000

First date with a guy: Seemed nice until he started talking about how much money he makes, then made a comment about how he’d like to take me away as I probably look good in a bikini. He made fun of my sleeping schedule ( I work on the westcoast for a stock brokerage… 6:30 start…), then asked if I’d like to go skinny dipping.
Fast forward to my bf now: we met as friends, I wasn’t interested in him at ALL! I actually suggested taking HIM out to get him laid.
He took his time and eventually let his intentions be known. We didn’t have sex for a month, as we wanted to take it slow – but… he’s the exception (of most guys I’ve dated). Most guys I’ve dated seem to lose interest when i tell them I’m not going to sleep with them on the 1st, 2nd or even 3rd date…
Gawd dating sucks.

By: Restaurant Gal

Restaurant Gal — Fri, 11 Apr 2008 01:54:40 +0000

Joe–Nicely said.

Mia–Part of this no-dates-for-me time (which can be eternity, as far as I am concerned) is to remember that I don’t need anyone in order to be anyone but me, and then to take time to simply be happy being me.

Deanna–Small gestures equals great sex. Indeed.

Julie–Ah yes, a lovely way to say, “Had a great time at dinner last night. Maybe we can meet for drinks again later this week?” Eeeew.

Heather–Always good to be thankful, and things are already better.

Deanna—As you put it so well, when the honeymoon is over, and reality sets in, small gestures of shared household chores can do wonders to make it feel easier to be all about sex.

Joe in Vegas–Oh you wonderful romantic, you!

By: joeinvegas

joeinvegas — Thu, 10 Apr 2008 18:48:31 +0000

I think it’s nicer just to sit in the coffee shop and have a drink together and stare out the window at everybody. But the, later, it’s all about the sex.

By: Lisa

Lisa — Thu, 10 Apr 2008 18:07:49 +0000

Deanna – that is so true! I’ve been married for two years now and my (younger, dating) friends and I were talking about turn-ons…They were listing the usual suspects “nice abs, nice butt, romantic dinner, massage” And me, the married one in the group is saying “dishes washed, laundry done….”
It’s because when I know those things are done, I can relax…otherwise it’s in the back of my mind that that stuff needs to get done!
It’s funny though because even though I’m married I find it’s still all about sex! DH and I were talking and he was complaining about the lack there of and I was complaining about the lack of help around the house (see the correlation?) and everytime I’d mention romance, or housework he’d come back with “But what about sex?” Aghhhhhh

By: heather (errantdreams)

heather (errantdreams) — Thu, 10 Apr 2008 17:44:49 +0000

I am suddenly intensely grateful for my wonderful husband and not having to be in the dating scene. I’d almost forgotten how utterly horrid it was. It’s good to be reminded of it now and then, so I remember to be thankful for what I have. I hope things get better for you!

By: Julie

Julie — Thu, 10 Apr 2008 15:33:01 +0000

Dating is difficult at best. After my divorce, I decided that I needed to get out and meet people rather than mope around the house. On my first “date,” the man across the table from me stared at my breasts the whole time. (I’d like to think that I have a pretty enough face to look at.) The next day, he sent me messages saying how he’d like to see my lips around a certain part of him. UGH! I was so freaked out — and so glad he didn’t have my phone number or know where I lived. After that, I wore turtleneck sweaters to every first date.

There were quite a few more toads — one kiss could never turn any of them into a prince — before I found my prince… and that took more than one kiss to find out.

By: Deanna

Deanna — Thu, 10 Apr 2008 15:22:45 +0000

I think for women, sex is mostly about intimacy. I’m not sure that’s the case for men. Even in a relationship, I think men think sex brings about intimacy, not vice versa. It’s hard to make them see that, for me, the small gestures of telling me I look nice, or bringing me home Diet Coke, or cleaning the litter box puts me in the mood much more than you grabbing my breast or asking me if I want to fool around.

By: Mia`

Mia` — Thu, 10 Apr 2008 15:05:33 +0000

Gotta agree with Joe. Been in and out of relationships like we all have….the best ones always came about when I wasn’t looking and wasn’t really interested in starting a new relationship. Honestly though, if you aren’t happy with you, if you don’t love you for you, how can anyone else?